Impact
A bit of a 3 year-old Jo Benet Ramsey but with enough tannic strength to cut thru all the make-up on the baby flesh.
Appearance 3.3 / 5
| Color: | dark electric brown (an omen for 60%) |
| Surface: | bar shock: blooming sugar crystals & pinholes; rare for Slitti who otherwise manufactures impeccable molds |
| Temper: | melted plastic |
| Snap: | cuffed |
Aroma 5.3 / 10
no nose, like some boxer whose face got pummeled flat & dull; bantamweight vanilla / sugar mix producing faint Milk Choc tracers; ash flecks & burnt coffee grounds on the bottom
Mouthfeel 10.7 / 15
| Texture: | agglomerated |
| Melt: | staggers |
Flavor 46.1 / 50
uncomplicated simplex: sugar-sugar -> soft chocolate squadron -> cocoa cake mix -> vanilla monster shake (custard base) -> core cocoa
Quality 16.8 / 20
Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler - Einstein
Which sums up why making things simple can be difficult. This bar is easy: Slitti achieves the ultra simplest centerline chocolate. Direct descendent of his Gran Cacao 90% but with 4x more sugar. No wonder chocolate makers employ it, & vanilla, more than, say, the derided vegetable oils. Together they can form a cohesive mask to cover even suspect beans. Here vanilla just stacks & loads atop the tannins while odorless cane sugar cleans up burnt residues in the bar's aromatics for quasi-Dark-Milk feel without the dairy.
Which sums up why making things simple can be difficult. This bar is easy: Slitti achieves the ultra simplest centerline chocolate. Direct descendent of his Gran Cacao 90% but with 4x more sugar. No wonder chocolate makers employ it, & vanilla, more than, say, the derided vegetable oils. Together they can form a cohesive mask to cover even suspect beans. Here vanilla just stacks & loads atop the tannins while odorless cane sugar cleans up burnt residues in the bar's aromatics for quasi-Dark-Milk feel without the dairy.