Impact
Practically D.O.A… these bars arrived in deplorable condition (see details below) hanging on for dear life. The kind of evil-smelling stuff lingering around the excavation at Zamora Chinchipe in Ecuador. There, archeologists recovered 5,000-year old cacáo vestiges (talk about possible vintage chocolate… try some). Totally incommensurate with the end-flavor of Lacumbia & Montubia herein which still somehow manages to prevail thru the flaws -- a sure sign of considerable endowments -- above what any overall rating could possibly gauge under the circumstances. Accordingly, they are unrated for even the dead should be respected.
To paraphrase death-scientist Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, these chocolates amount to the stained-glass window of the food world. Just about any bar sparkles & shines when substituting sugar for while the sun is out, but then pitch darkness sets in, its true beauty revealed only from the light within.
To paraphrase death-scientist Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, these chocolates amount to the stained-glass window of the food world. Just about any bar sparkles & shines when substituting sugar for while the sun is out, but then pitch darkness sets in, its true beauty revealed only from the light within.
Appearance -- / 5
packaged in the impregnable fortress of mylar; wrapped & sealed tighter than an Egyptian mummy
packaged in the impregnable fortress of mylar; wrapped & sealed tighter than an Egyptian mummy
| Color: | Ground Control -- some quality control issues... |
| Surface: | … hovering over Bloom City... |
| Temper: | … fuzzy as Frosty the Snowman... |
| Snap: | … cold anger |
Aroma -- / 10
Lacumbia
a sandstorm of cocoa dust turns into a maelstrom of dirt-vomit suffering from SDS (Sick Dog Syndrome) -> vinyl pleather -> copal
manifold to state the obvious
Montubia
horsetail on a flint stick
a sandstorm of cocoa dust turns into a maelstrom of dirt-vomit suffering from SDS (Sick Dog Syndrome) -> vinyl pleather -> copal
manifold to state the obvious
Montubia
horsetail on a flint stick
Mouthfeel -- / 15
| Texture: | breaking rocks |
| Melt: | choppy |
Flavor -- / 50
Lacumbia
cocoa stone -> vacant until a long-drawn gentle spice emerges -> cashew -> palm frond -> caramel -> port -> chocolate-almondine
Montubia
dulled fruit nibbles -> bland cocoa grain -> pub mash (including hops) -> transforms beautiful golden hay 'n honey -> crocus flowers -> saffron (rare) -> poppy seed -> malted hop -> soft ale -> excellent cocoa plunge at the tail
cocoa stone -> vacant until a long-drawn gentle spice emerges -> cashew -> palm frond -> caramel -> port -> chocolate-almondine
Montubia
dulled fruit nibbles -> bland cocoa grain -> pub mash (including hops) -> transforms beautiful golden hay 'n honey -> crocus flowers -> saffron (rare) -> poppy seed -> malted hop -> soft ale -> excellent cocoa plunge at the tail
Quality -- / 20
Despite a direct pickup from the maker at a trade show, the disastrous ancillaries (Appearance, Texture, & early-round Flavor) are almost ruinous to overcome. With all the infinite globetrotting Pacari undergoes to promote its wares, the company should've by now figured out a failsafe way to safeguard its products. Logistics, anyone? That aside…
Lacumbia
… flat for most of its length but inviting stamina serves a worthwhile, tremendous finish. So instead of wire-to-wire hedonics, this revolves to the endpoint, generalized as a chocolate-port of substantial depth & sweet caramelized laziness for that perfect mid-afternoon break to stop the world & get off.
Montubia
Texture really obstructs for quite awhile but only for so long as this cacáo breaks thru & into a white sandstone demeanor, set within some rarefied aromas of an exotic botanical garden. Saffron amidst chocolate? How many bars stake a claim to that? Few and far between.
The overarch of both Lacumbia and Montubia deliver something else. For starters the overall sense suggests unrefined cane sugar. Then the gastronomics within (port & beer) & these 2 bars combine staggeringly (given the aforementioned issues) for true chocoholics -- in the full literal portmanteau sense of the term -- who prefer stouts & apéritifs with dessert.
INGREDIENTS: cocoa mass, sugar, cocoa butter, sunflower lecithin
Reviewed December 1, 2015
Lacumbia
… flat for most of its length but inviting stamina serves a worthwhile, tremendous finish. So instead of wire-to-wire hedonics, this revolves to the endpoint, generalized as a chocolate-port of substantial depth & sweet caramelized laziness for that perfect mid-afternoon break to stop the world & get off.
Montubia
Texture really obstructs for quite awhile but only for so long as this cacáo breaks thru & into a white sandstone demeanor, set within some rarefied aromas of an exotic botanical garden. Saffron amidst chocolate? How many bars stake a claim to that? Few and far between.
The overarch of both Lacumbia and Montubia deliver something else. For starters the overall sense suggests unrefined cane sugar. Then the gastronomics within (port & beer) & these 2 bars combine staggeringly (given the aforementioned issues) for true chocoholics -- in the full literal portmanteau sense of the term -- who prefer stouts & apéritifs with dessert.
INGREDIENTS: cocoa mass, sugar, cocoa butter, sunflower lecithin
Reviewed December 1, 2015